MEANWHILE: "Shh - don't tell anyone I'm from the Empire"

MEANWHILE: General Grievous at the Comic-Con...

REVIEW: B.P.R.D. - The Ectoplasmic Man

I do my best to only read good comic books. The way I look at it - there's only a small amount of time I have on this planet, and I can't get return any of it for a refund (no matter how much I would like to sometimes). So when I read a comic I like, I feel it's time well spent.

And the latest B.P.R.D. one-shot by Mike Mignola and John Arcudi - is exactly that.

Time extremely well spent.

***SPOILER ALERT***

The comic chronicles the 'death' of Johann Kraus, a prominent medium (better known to Hellboy / B.P.R.D. fans as the Ectoplasmic Man).

Johann's death was sudden and unexpected, painfully taking the souls of others in a 'mistake' (of sorts) - leaving him bodyless and distraught at his situation. Unwilling (initially) to join the B.P.R.D. upon Izar Hoffman's suggestion - he decides instead to help those who have recently passed away move on...

Ben Stenbeck's artwork is truly beautiful (in an old, creepy sort of way), working wonderfully with Mignola and Arcudi's script, creating a sense of darkness with flickers of hope / light throughout. A difficult accomplishment.

All in all, it's been a long time since a book has left me with a "must go find more" thought in my head. Which can only be a good thing...

Pete's Score: 5 out of 5
(recommended - the perfect introduction to The Ectoplasmic Man and to the concept of the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defence)

REVIEW: Ultimate Human - 3 of 4

Within The Ultimates (my first Ultimate Universe read), I was introduced to a man displaced from time (Captain America), a man who strides tall (Giant-Man), his wife who can never shrink herself down in size enough to hide from her husband (The Wasp), a eco-friendly warrior (Thor), a drunken billionaire playboy (Iron Man), and an inadequate scientist with anger issues (The Hulk).

*** SPOILER ALERT ***

Ultimate Human (originally intended to be titled as Ultimate Hulk vs. Ultimate Iron Man) follows the story of a Bruce Banner seemingly desperate for a 'cure' to the errant Super-Soldier / Hulk genes present within him, and Tony Stark's attempts to 'help' (in his own special way).

The most immediate thing to mention is how Warren Ellis has chosen to take a brief departure from the cliffhanger ending of issue 2 (Tony and Bruce being kidnapped), focusing instead on how the Ultimate Leader came to be.

I found that learning about the origin of Peter Wisdom / the Ultimate Leader was more intriguing than exciting (which was a slight disappointment, given issue 2's ending, and my eagerness to pick this book up), but worthwhile nonetheless, especially to help us understand the reasoning behind this book's name change.

Artwork within the book is somewhat of a good mixed bag (as some pages carry the action well, others not so well, in favour of a stylistic approach) - but overall Cary Nord and Dave Stewart don't disappoint.

Pete's Score: 3 out of 5
(not bad - a good continuation of the story - but a sad change in tempo from the previous issue)

Rating comic books isn't as easy as it looks...

So, after only one review - I've realised something.

Having a 'whatever' out of five rating system is all well and good - but unless you read in between the lines - how on earth are you going to know what it means?

Well - to avoid any confusion - have a look at this...

This - is the brand spanking new www.biffbampowcomics.co.uk rating system. But what do all of the ratings mean?

A one out of five comic book / graphic novel is... Well - not brilliant really. I'd like to say words along the lines of 'scraping the barrel' - but if a comic on www.biffbampowcomics.co.uk gets this rating - it's only worth a buy if it's finishing off a collection, if you're wanting to read all the books in a crossover - or if you're feeling lucky. Punk.

A two out of five comic book / graphic novel is... A step up from terrible - not awful - but not brilliant either. More... Passable. There isn't anything wrong with this comic book - but there isn't really anything screaming 'read me, read me, READ ME' either. Worth picking up if it's a book in the middle of a series, halfway in the middle of a plotline, a crucial part in a crossover, if you're a fan of the writer and / or artist - or if you're willing to give a brand new series a chance.

A three out of five comic book / graphic novel is... Good - generally always worth a read, as it will usually progress the storyline / development of a character in an ongoing comic, or be a nice standalone graphic novel. Books getting three out of five marks may be considered by some to be worthy of fours or fives - but points will generally have been deducted if the writer has failed to bring elements together well (or in collected graphic novels, if the writer hasn't bothered to give any backstory for new readers), or if the artwork is a little shabby. Worth buying - you probably won't be blown away - but you're unlikely to be disappointed either.

A four out of five comic book / graphic novel is... A pretty frickin' good read. The storyline in this book will generally advance an ongoing story well, give great character development, and the artwork will be almost exactly what the script deserves. Buying this book will make good sense, and reading it should leave you happy...

A five out of five comic book / graphic novel is... Something that will improve your life. Reading this book will tax your brain, make you appreciate the finer things in life, and make you more attractive to the opposite sex. You can't afford to do without a five out of five book.

REVIEW: Avengers : Fairy Tales - 1 of 4

So here it is! My first 'official' review. And for some reason - I've chosen "Avengers: Fairy Tales" issue 1.

Oh @£$&.

I really really really wanted to like this book. And, if I'm honest, there were elements of it that I thought "yeah, I could read this again" - but nothing that really made me want to read it again. Or, sadly, the next issue for that matter.

***SPOILER ALERT***

So what's the book about?

Basically - think Peter Pan, and you've got it. The currently absent Scarlet Witch takes up the mantle of 'Wendy' in this story, living with her brother Quicksilver. One night they are visited by 'Peter Pan' (or The Captain in this case), and whisked off to Never Never Land.

Once there, Quicksilver gets lost, there's a rescue mission to save him, Kang plays the role of Captain Hook, annndddd... Yeah - I'm sorry to say that it just doesn't cut the mustard. The ending of the book (Wanda telling this tale to a group of children) leaves you wondering not where the book fits into continuity - by why it's even there.

Don't get me wrong - if you like fairy tales in general - you will love this book. I just can't admit to liking fairly tales all that much.

I do however like The New / Mighty / Classic Avengers. I like those books A LOT. And - I couldn't help but feel more than a little let down by this book - it really didn't deliver.

Pete's Score: 2 out of 5

(take the comic out the back, and put it out of it's misery)

Hellau big world wide web!

One day, a little while ago, I was sat at my iMac, reading comics, listening to podcasts, drinking tea and eating cookies. Anyone who knows me will tell you that it was 'just like any other normal day' - but on this particular day, I was down on my cash, I wanted to buy more comics - and I wanted to get them cheap.

I'd been taunted for about a year and a half, listening to Comic Geek Speak (which is well worth a listen) - hearing all about the wonders of fairly priced comic books on sale in America. But not in the UK - because of damn shipping charges.  
In the UK we have had to put up with 'collectors' editions if we want reasonably priced Marvel or DC goodness. 'Collectors' editions that are usually 2 or 3 years out of date. Or 'collectors editions' that have already been relased in far more 'collectable' manner - i.e. trade paperbacks or graphic novels.

"Well f@*k that for a game of chess" thought I.

I did some searching around while I was looking for cheap comics, and do you know - there wasn't one good online comic store in the UK that caters not only for a desire to read good books, but for people to talk about them too?

Again - "f@*k that" I thought.

All I'd ever wanted since I was a child was to be part of comics. I wanted to draw them, and I wanted to read them. Hell - I wanted to read them so badly at one point, I 'borrowed' my brother's entire collection, and craftily hid them under my bed, where he would neverfind them (until he did find them - and slapped seven shades of @*&$ out of me).

I wouldn't have borrowed them if I'd been able to afford them myself though.

I couldn't remember a time where I wasn't interested in reading about how Peter Parker and Mary Jane were getting on (or not, in the case of Brand New Day), or how Batman and Robin were fighting crime and patrolling the streets of Gotham (or, again, not, in the case of Knightfall).

But I'd never been able to find out what was going on without shelling out more money than makes good sense.

Back when I was a kid, I remember laughing my little cotton socks off over Giffen and DeMatteis' Justice League International. I'd wonder what was going to come up for Blue and Gold next - and I'd always be dying to chat with someone about it all.

But I couldn't. My mates couldn't afford to read the expensive imported comics. They could only get the 'reprints' - which at that time had such 'stunning' storylines lik DC's Millenium. Not a patch on what I was reading - comic books that had matured past the bad storylines - comic books that showed us what could have been with Amageddon 2001, or showed us the Hearts of Darkness within Wolverine, The Punisher and my Ghost Rider (Danny Ketch).

And did things improve over time? Well - a little - but not a great deal. I could log on to forums and talk comics with people in America (which wasn't bad - don't get me wrong - some of my favourite people are Americans) - but I couldn't help thinking - "wouldn't it be nice to chat to someone... Nearby me?"

So I decided I'd had enough of al that. I wanted comics. I wanted good prices. I wanted to talk to people nearby me about comics. 

And then I thought - "I bet you want comics too. And I bet you want good prices. And if I want to talk to people nearby me about comics - maybe you want to talk to people nearby you about comics too..."
So why the hell not...? If no-one else is going to give me and the rest of the UK what we need - then it's up to me.

I'm going to do my best to make www.biffbampowcomics.co.uk the best damn comic book store and meeting place you ever did see.

With great comics - comes great responsibility. Watch this space. And this space too.

Pete